Anger Management

Learning to control anger will eliminate major stress from your life.

If you allowed yourself, you could be mad and stressed out about something or someone all the time. People allow themselves to be angry about many things, and usually, they are things they can’t change. Some problems won’t be solved until Jesus comes. It’s not wise to spend your time fuming, especially over things that will never be resolved in this life. It’s a waste of time and emotion better spent living life, loving people and doing good.

The world is full of angry people being hateful to one another, and it’s really easy to get drawn into that kind of thinking. Don’t allow people or circumstances to make you angry or bitter. It’s possible to live above these things and enjoy the abundant life God has for you.

Since Cain killed Abel, Satan has been at work, pitting people against each other. It’s easy to see how he uses anger and hate to divide people. He wants everyone to be mad at someone—young against old or old against young, poor against rich, women against men and vice versa and one race against another. We mustn’t allow ourselves to get caught up in such worldly thinking.

Jesus said, “Let not your heart be troubled (angry, agitated, perturbed) ….” We can be part of the answer when we see the world from a heavenly perspective—the way God sees it.

God loves and values everyone equally. There are many groups and organizations today, complaining about inequality and demanding equality through politics. No place on earth practices equality like the body of Christ. Differences are erased by the blood of Jesus in God’s family. “There’s neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Gal. 3:28)

God promotes a love and oneness that seems impossible in society today. Not only does He love everyone the same, He commands us to love everyone as He does.

“Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” — Ephesians 4:31-32

We were sent to reach people, not to be angry and resentful toward them, no matter how annoying they may be! God views everyone the same, and so should we.

Scripture gives us a wonderful example in John 4. It is a real-life encounter that illustrates how Jesus dealt with difficult people. Rather than yielding to anger, He chose love and patience and won her heart—not just an argument.

The story is referred to as “the woman at the well” and begins after Jesus and His disciples had completed a long journey. Jesus was tired and sat down beside Jacob’s well in Samaria, and a local woman came to draw water from the well. The disciples had gone into town to buy food, and Jesus asked this Samaritan woman politely for a drink. The situation is understandable and shouldn’t have caused any controversy.

You may have some major conflict with someone in your life and can’t even remember how it started. It may have begun over something as simple as a drink of water, but it was the wrong time, wrong place and wrong person! These things happen all the time. We can avoid them by following Jesus’ example.

The water was free, but the well was deep and Jesus needed a water pot to draw the water out. The woman had a water pot. After Jesus asked for a drink, rather than handing Him one, she responded with attitude, ready for a fight. “She said, ‘How is it that You, being a Jew, ask a drink from me, a Samaritan woman?’ For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans” (John 4:9).

This woman was standing before God Himself on the most important day of her life. She didn’t know this moment would be recorded in God’s Word for all eternity for everyone to see. She didn’t know her encounter would demonstrate the love and mercy of God like no other. If she had, she wouldn’t have said what she said.

She was trying to start an argument. Jesus could’ve easily responded in anger in any number of ways. Instead, He totally ignored the charge, and refused to get involved in a debate. God loves Samaritans, and He felt no need to prove it.

What a great lesson for us today! Don’t be drawn into wordy, emotional arguments. Determine to love everyone in deed and in truth. As Jesus did, you can prove it with actions.

She was standing in the presence of God, and like Nicodemus, she didn’t know the answer. She didn’t even know the question!

Jesus showed immeasurable love and kindness toward this woman with an attitude. He helped her leave arguing and bickering behind by refocusing her attention on Him so she could get some real help.

Remember, He’s just been accused of racism.

“Jesus answered and said to her, ‘If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you, “Give Me a drink,” you would have asked Him, and He would have given you living water’” (Jn. 4:10).

In other words, “Lady, you asked the wrong question. Try this. Ask Me for a drink!” What love and mastery of His own emotions, avoiding a useless argument and turning the conversation into a life-changing moment for this woman. And it worked!

The woman said to Him, “Sir, You have nothing to draw with, and the well is deep. Where then do You get that living water? Are You greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well, and drank from it himself, as well as his sons and his livestock?” (Jn. 4:11-12)

Now that’s a good question! That’s an appropriate question for someone standing before God. Who are you, Jesus, and how can you give me living water?

“Jesus answered and said to her, ‘Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.’” (Jn. 4:13-14)

Now, He had her full attention!

“Sir, give me this water, that I may not thirst, nor come here to draw.” (Jn. 4:15)

By responding with love and patience, He gained a convert. But then, this encounter went from intense to amazing, then to awkward.

“Jesus said to her, ‘Go, call your husband, and come here.’ The woman answered and said, ‘I have no husband.’ Jesus said to her, ‘You have well said, “I have no husband,” for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; in that you spoke truly.’” (Jn. 4:16-18)

That’s embarrassing. Just when things were getting good between them, Jesus brought up her secret sin—something she certainly didn’t want Him to know. Why would He do that? I believe it’s because He didn’t want her to leave, thinking, If He knew what I was really like, He would have never offered me living water. By revealing her sin, He was telling her He knew all about her life and what she’d done and the offer for living water still stood.

Then He revealed His identity to this precious woman in a way that seldom occurred in His earthly ministry.

The woman told Him she knew the Messiah was coming and when He came, He would tell them all things. Jesus said, “I who speak to you am He.” (Jn. 4:25-26)

She instantly became a witness in her community, and heaven will tell how many people she led to Christ in her lifetime.

This is one of the most holy, sacred encounters in the New Testament, and it all started with a woman with an attitude trying to start an argument.

This is what Paul was telling Timothy about:

“Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth. Then they will come to their senses and escape from the devil’s trap. For they have been held captive by him to do whatever he wants.” —2 Timothy 2:25-26 (NLT)

We should follow Jesus’ example when dealing with difficult people, there’s more at stake than making a point or defending your position.

Life is different when you’re more interested in winning a soul than winning an argument!

Jesus said, “Let not your heart be troubled…” and by following this simple command, you can get your joy back and enjoy life even in these challenging times. In this series you’ll learn to refuse to engage in battles where you don’t belong and see how Jesus responded to difficult people without losing His cool. By following His example, you too can live in the end times without losing your mind!